My parents still don’t know what I do!

BEEP-BEEP! BEEP-BEEP!! rang the alarm clock. It was 4:30 am. I had just fallen asleep, but it didn’t matter because I wasn’t tired. I stumbled out of bed, and hobbled towards the “computer room”.

A 98' purple-glazed Compaq Presario powerfully sat in front of me. I fired it on, and anxiously watched Windows 98 boot up. I then opened Windows Explorer, Notepad, Internet Explorer, and launched a 56.6 kbps dial-up internet connection through our ISP (VSNL). Once the internet connection was established, I initiated a CuteFTP session, logged into my Yahoo Geocities dashboard, browsed through the AddFreeStats console, checked my Double Click ad rotation metrics, and began to internet search for content to add as my next news story.

If you haven’t guessed it already, I was a webmaster of a wrestling news website, and member of a global web-ring of highly trafficked underground sports websites. As an ad publisher, I‘d receive checks in the mail. Month over month, I would sprint to the mailman to intercept any wrongful delivery. It was important not to leave room for suspicion. For some odd reason, I never spent a single penny of my website revenue.

In terms of covering for web hosting costs, I had managed to persuade mom into lending me her credit card. With that, I purchased a domain name and premium web hosting — it was a treat! The recurring charge was relatively minuscule and perfectly ambiguous on the credit card statement. To my luck, it went by unquestioned during her monthly audits.

This was my world for 12 hours a day. Outside of this, I spent 7 hours attending school, and 5 hours sleeping. Nothing else interested me. My parents were at work all day. When they were home, I usually received their mysterious acknowledgment. To them, I was purely innocuous, a child acting on his natural curiosity in the “computer room”. Did they know their 14 year old was attempting to discover what the world wide web meant beyond email? Probably not.

Fast forward 19 years, and mom, at a Saturday cocktail party if asked to describe his son’s profession would probably utter “he fixes computers”. In reality, I help Fortune 500 juggernauts leverage software to gain market share. But, to mom, that’s admiring jabber, and I love her for it.

Based on widespread evidence out there, I can confidently assert that I am not the only one who feels this warm though fundamental disconnection from their parents. In the last 20 years, society has transformed at such a monumental pace, that it has superseded the speed at which we can possibly adapt our everyday life and relationships. For the purpose of leading a healthy life, many have anchored down around a vetted stability point. And from here, they’ve decided to throttle in change at a more sustainable rate.

But, I’ve chosen not to throw the anchor down just yet — and I know I’m not alone. I instead want to be lost in today’s maddening velocity, and watch where the tide takes our society. I wish to see the old political guard challenged, economic systems overhauled, societal structures remade, new belief systems formed, moralities evolved, and the universal regard for humanity transcend all divisions that today cause wars, discrimination, epidemics, and so on. I wish to watch every frame of this profound change unfold amidst our society. In doing so, I want to closely experience the force of transformation work its course, and as a result have an incredible story to recite to my kids someday. To me, that would be life worthwhile.

Millennials were born at the trough of an impending wave that would forever change human society. Scholars are breathlessly running out of ways to describe this phenomenon — some call it the 4th Industrial Revolution, others name it the 2nd Machine Age. Whatever it is, it is vastly different from the era that mom was born into. She grew up in the 60s and 70s, a time when the idea of a “decent life” entailed freedom, responsibility, family, stability, home ownership, patriotism, and so on.

Today, a millennial’s idea of a decent life often entails the desire to upend the entire planet for a deeply passionate cause. To catalyze this ambition is the internet, which provides a level playing field, and inspiration literature, which assumes the shape of modern-day religion. One can achieve anything in the present day system. This explains the relentless rise of new internet businesses, the talent drought being experienced by large incumbent companies, and why tech companies are investing serious capital to galvanize their workplace. Its to basically feed our incessant desire for mind stimulation and personal achievement.

This however also means that we are prone to a serious psychic restlessness with conformity coupled with an allergy to stagnation. Its absolutely crazy! Anything remotely close to routine often begins to erode the imagined richness of possibility. Explosive spontaneity and fast-forwarded practicality is our mind medicine. We want to cover as much territory as possible in the shortest amount of time, but we won’t allow ourselves to be patiently filled by life experience. As a result, we have all sorts of psychic disorders today.

But, life cannot be measured by the scale of individual impact or per the magnitude of one's ambition. Life is instead filled by the richness of experience, and the fulfillment of purpose.

Coming back to the original theme of generational commonality, I find the concept of values and principles remaining fairly consistent — to be honest, to do the right thing, to be responsible, to believe in charity are elements that uncontroversially span multiple generations. In doing so, these remain a source of collective strength. They promote authentic connection. However, other fundamental questions such as the idea of a decent life and individual thought structure vary drastically between generations, and can serve as a source of tension, especially in closely knit social systems.

I ruminate often about this stuff. Just like mom, I’m living through something I’ve never experienced before. But we’re in it together. We’re playing our individual roles. We’re filling in our voids. Mom may not know how or on what I spend a significant part of my day. But that’s not important. As long as she understands I abide by the same values and principles as her, the rest is white noise.

If I can place trust in the historical products of social change, I can remain optimistic. Looking back, our society has always harnessed the best of such overhauling periods. Its impressive. In saying so, I can safely conclude that we remain better prepared than ever to confront the transformational force before us, and channel it towards preserving our most sacred possession— our relationships.